It's hard to believe that it has been a year since I began to talk to the most amazing person that has walked into my physical life. A year ago I was a struggling teen, working out who I was, where I fit in, what I wanted from life... everything a teenager struggles with. Yet in my life I was trying too hard. Hanging out with the wrong people, doing the wrong things, everything. Then one Mr. Trevor Allan D. walked into my life. I was the crazy one and he was the mellow, always follow the rules one.
With everything I had gone through in life he seemed like he understood. he was the best friend I had never really had; the shoulder to cry on; the hand to hold; the everything I needed then. I had told myself that during my junior year of high school I was not going to look for a boyfriend, I was putting my love life in God's hands and out of mine. Not even 3 months into my junior year Trev and I began talking. It was like for even a second that I talked to him, everything was right in the world.
I sometimes refer to him as my angel that God knew I needed and so he sent him to me.
Today I was at dinner with Trevor, his parents, his brother Dj, and Dj's girlfriend Abbi; it came to me that almost a year ago I was sitting there awkward and I couldn't bring myself to talk. Then today I was normal and shoving my hand into a pumpkin that I had failed at carving. It was like a home away from home.
Thursday.
Thursday, November 1, 2012.
One year. Holy shit.
I know to some people all they think is that, oh, I'm just a silly eighteen year old who doesn't know what love really is. I do. He is love. This past year Trevor has shown me what it means to live. All I know is I am a very lucky person and I would not take back anything in my life. All the mistakes, lies, and speedbumps... They all led me to him. And I would be out of my sanity to want that to have never happened.
I love you Trevor Allen(:
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